Reasons

It is Sunday in America. My mother had stayed for the night and we both went to the church. I came burdened and empty in my soul. There was no desire to greet people or even rejoice. This emotional condition stayed with me until the evenening. During the day, my mum and I ate a lot of different delicous food, but it did not relive us both from feeling alone and sad.

When she left home, to her apartment, I prayed and waited on the Lord. After reading few scriptures, the understanding came to me about the sutuation.

Let me tell you. Last night I was awakened by the dream. I saw Sam and there was another girl who did not notice him, but he followed after her. I, on the other hand, noticing Sam, pursueded some Christian activity. It was a group of young people who did something for the Lord. I remember thinking that I do my choice in pursuing Jesus and His activites, but it felt pain concerning Sam. Whe I awoke around 5 am, there was already feeling of discourgament and grief.

I remember going to church speaking ooutloud: It's been so long since we separated and you still concern about him. I counted months: It was about September, and not it is December: more than 3 months.

I analyzed and pondered about the other day: candles and carols night. I saw him at Reardon singing and feeling glad for him. However, it is when I saw him leaving the auditorium with anoth young lady. He gave us double hugs for both my mum and me and left. I wanted him to leave and just ignore the situation. So I waited to think about it and cast it aside and it came over me this Sunday.

Lord,
Thank You so much that even this situation are all redeamable. I thank you tha tby Your great mercy and plan You did not let me be int eh relationahip with Nick cause I will never be where I am other wise. Thank you that You, Jesus Are the One and Best. Give us courage to face the truth and despise the lost and Run after You.
You knwo that it is painful to me because at times I get hopeful and then experience a wave of hopeless days, etc. But You are my Victory and Together we will find stregnth. You are for me.
SO I pray that You would richly bless Samuel with Your presence and guidance. Forgive me for any offenses and griefs related to him. Let him live the way You ordanied for him and make him successful in all he does. I bless the relationships he chooses to engage in. May he be happy and restored to the fullness in Jesus Name.
God bless you.

Father, Thank you for Your Son Jesus. For Your precious free gift to believe and live in Christ.

In love, Katya

List

Chuck Pierce in the prophetic word spoke this phrase: "make a list of things you want to know and I will not limit My revelation to you this hour."

1. Love of God
2. Faith
3. The Gospel
4. The Family
5. the Dance
6. Commune with Jesus face to face
7. Death and Life in Christ
8. Words
9. God's knowledge about us before our birth and His plans for the future.

My goal is to learn from Jesus, because He is my Best teacher. I also rely on te work of th Holy Spirit in me. May the ocean of love and the faith of God be near me day after day.

I want to be focused on one thing, or in other words, on important purposes in Christ. I see the main goal right now is to commune with Jesus face to face and learn the Word from Him. Then I want to be sent to preach the Gospel to people. My next desire is that passion for romance, sexual desires and longings for a relationship will go to sleep and rest but only the LOVE for Jesus be ACTIVATED daily.

I could already sayt that the work of Christ in me had started. He vistited me and taught about the love. Continue...

Lord, dear Jesus Christ,

the Life in the Spirit is very important. We need to be aware the way we talk and live by faith in the Son of God. Most important is to commune with You face to face.

I want to repent for the words speaking about myself in unbelief. Here I would like to speak the words of building up toward myself through You and Your Word.

Thank you so much that You gave me life through Jesus. I am a new creature who lives a life not in the flesh but by faith.
Thank You for displaying Your strength and power in the areas of the weakness or limits. However, May You perform miracles through the dances and songs that I do. May You display anointing that sets captive free, Touch people through this vessel.

Thank You very much for the LOVE, God!!!! Thank YOU For the LOVE and Your FAITHFULNESS!

On Saturday nights right after the prayer meeting, I had a dream. There was a beautiful long dress (bage or sand color) on me. At first it covered by very unatractice coat (dark blue) as to cover the dress. But as I came into the classroom and found a place to seat, the professor asked me to tell my story, so I stood up and the first thing I did was to uncover my dark coat. I said, "You probably surprised that I am wearing this dress, but let me take this coat off." People were laughing. So I was in the dess, feeling very beautiful and gorgeous. The very next day, on Sunday I wore something new and beutiful and tried to experience the same feeling of worth that I had in my dream. It was awesome!!!!

Today the Holy Spirit reminded me to go back to the prophecy given by Chuck Pierce on www.elijahlist.com . And there the Lord let me understand that He has given a mantle to wear of freedom and glory for the next 14 months. Our goal is to stay and abide in His presence and worship!!!!!!!! This is exactly what has been going on.

I bless the Lord, my Father in HEvaen, His SOn Jesus Christ and beloved Holy SPirit.

Katya

Blessed be the Name of Jesus,

This posting is about searching and struggling. I feel warning in my spirit and yearning not to forsake the presence of God. Despte the fact of intense and enjoyable time spent with Samuel (Gabriel) for the last two or three days, my soul is deeply yearning not to be escaped from the love and the presence of God. I hunger to go to the prayer meeting with Judy. I see the needs of things to pray for, such as Zimbabwe, Sam's needs, etc.

The interesting fact that I already received three letters from N., and of course, I did not reply to any of them. Sharing this with my mom, she noticed the pattern that whenever I and Sam are doing well N. appears on the page.

So, my prayer is to be in tune with the Holy Spirit and remian ALERT in this time. Lord, may you awake my soul from slumber and help me to stand in prayer with brothers and sisters in Your Holy Presence. You are still entroned in Heven and praised by Your people.
May Your name be glorified.

I ask Your Protection over Your people across the nations.
May the fire of God come down to purge us from sins and faults
May Your love covers us like the wings.
May You seal us in the covenant of the Blood of Jesus Christ.

In Jesus Name, Amen

Crossroad

I had a dream today and right after the dream I was awake. The only part I remember is seeing the library and suddenly Sam looked at me: his face was so beautiful adn shone like an angel. And I heard the word "crossroad". I know this dream is from the Lord, because it was so bivid and thelook of Sam's eyes were like of angel piercing. And I have to say that all that was like in a moment, instant.

I went online and searched for meaning.
1. intersection: a place where two or more roads meet or cross each other, especially in a rural or quiet area
2. rural community: a small town or community located at a crossroads ( takes a singular verb )
3. meeting place: a central meeting place that has a lot of activity ( takes a singular verb )
4. decisive moment: a time when an important decision must be made

In my heart, even in the dream I knew it was about the decision or choice that Sam is facing concerning me. He had three dreams of similar account a month ago. Three days in a dream God would bring me to him and let Sam decide whether he wanted or not to be with me. But everytime Sam would wake up without making a decision in his dream.

By the way, we have met yesterday. It went very well and there are some sweet things he said and I felt satisfied. But I know that he is in the season of a crossroad: last year at college, planning his stay for a month in Italy and other things.

Is there a word for him, Lord? Is there a way you want him to be encouraged during this time?

May You be near him and guide him to the choices that will glorify Your name.

Water why?

This maybe a long posting but it is very fresh and important.

First of all, I will try to recall the dreams that I had recently that were tighly connected to the water. Several days I pondered about the meaning of seeing and beeing in a water.

For example, today I was in a pool and made deep jumps into the water and out. It was wonderful and colorful dream. The jumps were more sure, quick and confident.

My first dream was several days ago. I was behind the window and observed the see and the sheap that was in the process of building. I asked what it was and there were several workers standing with their feet on the water. I was surprised in my dream. In the same dream right outside of the place I observed the sea and the sheap, I saw a car, I opened the door and the water came inside of the right seat.

The very next dream on the following night was involved with water too. This time it was a river. A friend of mine walked with her ankles in the water and on a thin line. I also was surprised.


Today I hvae received a revelation that the Lord is moving me into a new and unfamiliar place. That is why I was surprised in all my dreams. In addition to that, I have encountered several temptations and attacks from satan, but the Holy Spirit taught me this word: "you need perseverance... do not shrink away...".

I am in awe of the Lord!!!!!

"my soul thirst for You.
My body longs for You"

You need Perseverance

Hellod dear readers of my blog,

I greet you today in the name of the Lord.

Last night I had an experience that led me to evaluate some things. I did not resist the temptations and after that I prayed about the reason for that. The holy Spirit pointed out the scriptured in Hebrews that illuminate the problem. I NEED PERSEVERANCE IN TIMES OF PRESSURE.

35So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. 36You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised. 37For in just a very little while, "He who is coming will come and will not delay. 38But my righteous one[f] will live by faith. And if he shrinks back, I will not be pleased with him."[g] 39But we are not of those who shrink back and are destroyed, but of those who believe and are saved. (Hebrews 10: 35-39)

Temptations are overcome even during the pressure when we master perseverance.

Then I sensed the Holy Spirit's direction: Take your time and effort deliberately finish your own and someone else's job. For example, wash the dishes.
I was still writing this phrase and stood up and went to the kitchen and washed all the dirty dishes in the sink. I wrote a letter to a friend with whom I am required of patience and perseverance.

Today during the work, I deliberately studied the material on perseverance and practicaly acted it out. I send emails to people who waited my responses or certain actions. I thought of continuing woorking on dancing and singing with the "Dust", abotu my long term papers and others.

And Thank You Blooger for allowing me to use this cite to continuosly write the path I am walking and the lessons I am learning.

God bless you!

enjoying my present time

I really enjoy this day and this hour. The present moment is around me like a blanket, it covers me from anxiety and haste. I love bein gat this moment and doing the things I need with love and extra time.

Today, I have spent almost an hour seraching and looking through different books on dance. The printed copies of the exercises and certain moves added to my bag. The worship leader from Parl Place emailed me to notify about the preparation for the dance cantata "Breath of Heaven".

Then Papa Oleg called several times, Iana gave a call too. It is a very lovely day, where I enjoy the present moment.

T H A N K Y O U L O R D !

People have things to say

HELLO dear friends,

I would like to share with you abou ttwo meaningful conversations that I had recently.

To keep their names private, I will identify them as:

October 28, AN ELDERLY FEMALE SEMINARY STUDENT who said: "Do your best to honor God".
October 29, AN ELEDERLY MALE SEMINARY STUDENT who said: "Build precious memories with your mom. Enjoy every single day with her."

I think it is important to stop and to listen to what people say to you. I have been told and instructed to honor God and to build precious memories with my mom.


P.S. Would it be a great idea to have a blog of the things people say to you that are meaningful and special?

eat and are satisfied

For the last few days, the Lord gave me so much food to eat. At some point I was even noticing how much food I eat. So I prayed honestly to God, hoping that food will not become something more important than God. THe same thing with the things I have in my room. There are so much stuff. WHat shall I do? I am thinking where and what to give away.

As I prayed, the Lord reminded me the scripture that it is not because of righteousness or what we have done that the Lord is good to us. But as I read this scripture from Deuteronomy, I found an answer to my wondering concerns.

Deuteronomy 8: 10
When you have eaten and are satisfied, praise the Lord your God for the good land He has given you.
Be careful that you do not forget the Lord your God...
Otherwise, when you eat and are satisfied, when you build fine houses and settle down, and when your herds and flocks grow large and your silver and gold increase and all you have is multiplied, then you heart will become proud an dyou will forget the Lord your God, who brought you out of the land of slavery.


Thank You Dear Lord,
I love you and THank You for Answering to my heart issues and concerns tonight.
You are great among all others. No one can take Your place, Holy One.

Who am I?

Today, I had issued some things in my mind and shared them with Rhyse.
The issue is whether I am a missionary or a preacher.

When we talk about missionary, I feel down and disinterested,
whereas when we talk about preaching, I feel passion and ignited.

Lord, what's the problem and dilema?

I hope to hear from You either confirmation or correction.

Katya

healing and the Redeemer

Today, I am meditating about two topics: healing and the Redeemer.

There is one article that I need to read "Navajo Medicine" and I want to compare the practice of healing in two cultures: Indian and Christian. In addition, yesterday my papa Oleg called and shared that he was very sick. That day the scripture that I read was James 5: 14-15.
As I was reading the materials, I saw that Christ always takes our sins, burdens to Himself; this is an act of redemption. We were brought with the price, the death of Christ on the cross was a redemption.

This is a wonderful Monday. Early in the morning I started doing my homework. The Lord provided the questions that I supposed to answer from the book. He Alone Knows my needs and provides everything. I praise Him!

It is a beautiful day: warm and breezy. Last night the Lord blessed with a great rehearsal of Arabic songs. Even though my whole day was of sadness and trial, the evening was so annointed!!! I praise Him! Rhyse and I stayed until midnight at Armanso, Zen and Rory's place and our band "Dust" had a great time in worship and practice.

I saw how God knows my needs and cares for them. It is obvious!

Oh, today I felt and anticipated to see Sam. Indeed, he came to the lab and sat next to me writing his paper. The thing is he looked completely strange to me, not like I knew him before. He did not speak with me much, even though I tried to engage a little in conversation. After I wrote my paper, I just left. It became clear that I am no longer of interest to him. It is ok. One day Job said something like this: "naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked I will depart. The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised." (Job 1:21).

Dear Heavenly Father, I pray that my heart and all my life will be of worship to You alone.
P.S. The great two songs I discovered by God Chasers: "Will you worship" and "Hungry".

love and peace

My goal is to live every day with LOVE and PEACE. I think that other roles such as being a student, a mother (one day), a minister or any others are only additional species of who we are. But the life in the Spirit of God is of peace and love.

Romans 8: 6 "the mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace"

The peace and love can be instruments of God's grace to touch other lives.

Galatians 5:22 "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindnes, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control." "let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other".

Phillipians 4:11-12 "I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry...

Rhyse said that love is equal to the fruit of the Spirit. Compare 1 Corinthians 13 and Galatians 5.

cooking food

It was such an ordinary morning. I did not feel inspired to pray or worship the Lord. So, I took a shower, read some chapters in Exodus and Numbers. Then I opened the Cook Book and came up with ideas of what I need to buy. I chose three dishes: fried rice, Greek salat and grilled cheese sandwich. Then I took my bike and rode to the Pay Less. I spent 42 dollars. In Pay Less I met Keth who is a Missionary.

It was a litlle bit tough to go home but the Lord helped me a lot. I came home with two heavy plastic bags and my purse-bag. Immediately I started cooking fried rice. It turned out so delicios that I thought Whome can I invite for lunch or dinner.

The point of this post is to show you that God cares of our needs. Yesterday I prayed that the Lord would provide food to eat, cause I did not have it here at the new apartment. ANd He did!

Praise the LORD

The dream

Hello friends,
I received a phone call from Phil, my papa in America who told me that he had adream about me.

It started out that Sam and I were in the balcony, then Phil came in and I bursted into crying, so Phil hugged me and comforted.
Then he saw me living with different people.
Then I was in a box and looked too skiny. I asked him to take my coat from me.
And finally, Phil met Sam in cafeteria in his dream. Phil asked Sam, "Where is Katya?" Sam answered, "She is not here."

This dream conforms the reality of what I am going through. I have started to pack my belonging to move into a new house to live with a new person.
Secondly, Sam and I are not together anymore, thus the words "She is not here" implies to me that I am no longer in his life or in his heart. Thirdly, balcony to me means as if it is something that is oradined by God in the spirit. We have not goned there but were put in that place.
I guess according to the dream, I experience pain more that Sam does. No matter what and how the degree of my feelings of pain, I know that God is good and it is all for His glory. I am where I need to be, period!



Corrections:

"But the hope does not disappoint us, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit." Lord, we were apart for a season, but by Your great love and mercy You led us to be together. Thank You So Much!!!! You Are So Good!!! Lord, may there be a separation from the sin, rather than from the wonderful relationship given by Your outstanding grace. Thank you again, my Lord Jesus.

A new house and scholarship

Dear friends, I have good news.

The Lord provided the scholardship that reduces the price for tuition in 55%, THUS MAKING IT $3000 per semester. In addition, there is one openning in a Seminary House ($215 per month), thus this is an answer to the prayer if I could live somewhere but not in the house I am right now. Praise the Lord!

This morning I read from 2 Kings 8: 1-6 which pictures so well the situation I am in. The Lord speaks and conforms the plan and direction for me to go.

Now Elisha had said to the woman whose son he had restored to life, "Go away with your family and stay for a while wherever you can, because the Lord has decreed a famine in the land that wil alst seven years." The woman proceeded to do as the man of God said. She and her famile went away and stayed in the land of the Philistines seven years.
At the end of the seven years she came back from the land of the Philistines and went to the king to beg for her house and land. The king was talking to Gehazi, the servant of the man of God, and had said, "Tell me about all the great things Elisha has done." Just as Gehazi was telling the king how Elisha had restored teh dead to life, the woman whose son Elisha had brought ack to life came to beg the king for her house and land.
Gehazi said, "This is the woman, my lord the king, and this is her son whol Elisha restored to life." The king asked the woman about it, and she told him.
Then he assigned an official to her case and said to him, "Give back everything that belonged to her, including all the income from her land from the day she left the country until now."

A New Transition in Life

Hello dear friends and visitors!

I want to share with you an amazing journey that I have been walking.
On September 5, 2008 after an intimate and lon gprayer with My Maker,
I was riding the bycicle to campus and on my way this thought came to my heart:
SEMINARY. Let me also say that prior to that my summer has been great yet with a
determination to recieve an OPT (Optional Practicum Tranining ) to work coming year in teh area of my studies. However, that particular day, Friday, I had a life changing transition.

In addition, this summer I had expirienced a great friendship with Samuel Green. We had been a cute couple aslo until recently. Few days ago, we agreed that our goals and future destination differ from each other and therfore we have two different roads to walk. He is pursuing a perforamnce degree in opera and I am studying in the seminary to be a minister.

Corrections: Lord, You Are Above our thoughts and ways. I repent for judging so quickly Your divine plan. Now, as we are back together with Sam, forgive me for the words spoken in unbelief. Father, we are both want to be used by You the Way You destined us to do. Create and Shape by Your design. I hope that You will open a vision and a door for us both to be in a united vision and goal. May we be a team that edifies and fulfills Your desires across the nations. I Love You Father.

Because of this change in our relationship, I had been praying and seeking God's will about possibly moving out to a seminary housing. It appeared to me that it will be beneficial in many areas: from close proximity to school, to being a way from a constant seeing Sam at the house. Well, several people appraoched me with a question whether I will stay at the house. But today I made a decision based on the clear understanding of the will of God. So, I just say " Thank You Father". I will move to the housing that You prepared a place for me. There is only one opening in a female two room apartment.

So these three transitions in my life right now, cause me to ponder and concern a lot, yet the Lord speaks to me this scripture: "He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty." He also put a song in my heart and spirit that day when Sam and I agreed on stopping our dating. These are the words to the song:

Come and worship only
To the One you love (x 2)

He who dwells in the shadow of Most High,
will find refuge in the wings of God (x 2)

Joy and gladness shout inside,
You annoint with oil my darkest night (x2)

Augustine

Breathe in me, Holy Spirit,
that my thoughts may be holy.
Act in me, Holy Spirit,
that my work , too, may be holy.
Draw my heart, Holy Spirit,
That I may love only what is holy.
Strengthen me, Holy Spirit,
To defend all what is holy.
Guard me, Holy Spirit,
that I may always be holy.

Phillips Brooks

Do not pray for easy lives. Pray to be stroner men.

Do not pray for tasks equal to your powers.

Pray for powers equal to your tasks.

deep hunger

What I feel inside my being is a deep hunger for the Living Christ. I long for Him in hours and minutes of a day. I pray and I sign...

Have you ever being in a place of spiritual drought? I believe that even in the religion a person can become a spritual prisoner. Yet Christ is faithful and He is the only one I need.

Dear Lord,

I am so bad today. It is like a a torture in my soul to become annoyed, angry, upset and discouraged. My mum is sufering because of that. I feel powerless and exhausted.

What shall I do?

I know I need to repent and change, but I can't.

Have I become too much selfish?

RULE in me by the HOLY SPIRIT.

In Father,

Katya

Invited to the Feast

I had a dream where I said to somebody:"Today is a feast!". Well, I thought I had only 4 dollars left to get food, but decided to stop by ATM machine and check the money, and as I said before, there were $163 dollars. I thanked the Lord!

Then today was the day of great dinner with Phil and Tara. They invited Ziyod and Lani, JM and me. I told them that would come, but today I felt so uncomfotable to go there, that I was looking for reasons not to go. WEll, Rhyse called and asked to postpone our dance practice fom 4 pm till 5:15pm, I agreed. Anyway, after having a productive time, We finished at 7 pm. Then we went to Panera were I treated her with a dinner as a feast.

Here is the story in the Bible that I just read:

"The kingdom of heaven is like a king who gave a wedding banquet for his son, and sent his servants to summon those who had been invited to the wedding banquet, but they refused to come.Again he sent other servants, saying, 'Tell those who are invited, Behold, I have prepared my banquet... everything is prepared; come to the wedding feast. But they were not concerned and paid no attention- they ignored and made light of the summons, treating it with contempt- and they went away, one to his farm, another to his business, while the others seized his servants, treated them shamefully and put them to death.

Then he said to his servants, th ewedding feast is prepared, but those invited were not worthy. So go to the thoroughfares where they leave the city- where the main roads and those from the country end- and invite to the wedding feast as many as you find. And those servants went out on the crossroads and got together as many as they found, both bad and good, the room which the wedding feast was helf was filled with guests. But when the king came in to view the guests, he looked intently at a man there who had on no wedding garment; adn he said, Friend, how did you come in here without putting on the appropriate wedding garment? And he was speechless )muzzled, gagged).

For many are called (invited and sumoned), but few chosen." Matthew 22:2-14

give to the poor

"Go and sell what you have and give to the poor, and you will have the riches in heaven..." Matthew 19:21

Today, to my surprise I had $163.02 in my debit card. Praise the Lord! This is the last check from work on campus. I took off $20, 00 to get food and money for the laundry. Then I spent $50,00 for the Food of the poor (sorry, it should be in secret). And I have still $ 93.02 left. I know that it is aweful to live hungry and without money. There are some blessigns from that, but unless you receive some help, it's difficult.

Lord, I pray that you will change my mind and attitude toward poor, so that I will not remain wealthy on the earth but rich in heaven. Help me to be reminded to give to the poor everytime there is something to give. Oh Lord, help them soon!!!

Amen.
Another example that my friend just shared with me. At the grocery store, there was a man who at the counter did not have enough money to pay for the food and he asked the lady to take off some items. But the man behind him said, I will pay fo ryou whatever you have left.

Thank You Dear Lord!!!

Little children, you are of God- you belong to Him, ...

He Who is in you is greater (mightier) than he who is in the world.

1 John 4:4

I continue to pray and meditate about His presence inside me. I want to be a body, spirit and soul that contains the Holy Spirit, just as it is written in the New Testament.

you are living the life of the Spirit, if the Holy Spirit of God really dwells within you- directs and controls you. But if any one does not possess the Holy Sprit of Christ, he is none of His- he does not belong to Christ, is not truly a child of God. but if Christ lives in you, then although your natural body is dead by reason of sin and guilt, the spirit is alive because of the righteousness that He imputes to you. And if the Spirit of him Who raised up Jesus from the dead dwells in you, then He Who raised up Christ Jesus from te dead will also restore to life your mortal (short-lived, perishable) bodies through His Spirit Who dwells in you.

Romans 8:9-11

Poverty- source

I have wondered about an issue of poverty. Many times I heard and believed too that poverty is a demonic thing. So instead of having a compassion on people, we treat them as those possessed by devil. But when we ourselves become poor or step into their shoes, we discover how needy and unworthy we are, how desperate we are for God and mercy. When you are poor, you become to see the graces of God that in other times you take for granted. When you are poor, you feel low and humble, sometimes there is self-pity, but there is also a remorse. How can we say that poverty comes from devil? Why would God be so concerned for the poor and widowed, orphans and foreigners?

I want to look at the Word and search whether poverty is a demonic activity or whether it is not.
Help me the Holy Spirit to find the truth, so that my heart will not be wrong before God.

Amen.

Therefore the kigdom of heaven is like a human king who wished to settle accounts with his attendants. When he began the accounting, one was brought to him who owed him ten thousand talents (probably about $10,000,000), and becuase he could not pay, his master ordered him to be sold, with his wife and his children and everything that he possessed, and payment to be made. So the attendant fell on his knees, begging him, hHave patience with me and I will pay you everything. And his master;s heart was moved with compassion, and he released him and forgave him (cancelling) the debt. But that same attendant, as he went out, found one of his fellow attendants who owed him a hundred denarii (about twenty dollars); and he caught him by the throat and said, Pay what you owe! So his fellow attendant fell down and begged him earnestly, Give me time, and I will pay you all! But he was unwilling and went out and had him put in prison till he should pay the debt. When his fellow attendants saw what had happened, they were greatly distressed, and they went and told everything that had taken place to their master. Then his master called him and said to him, You contemptible and wicked attendant! I forgave you and cancelled al that great debt of yours because you begged me; and should you not have had pity and mercy on your fellow attendant, as I had pity and mercy on you? And in wrath his master turned him over to the torturers (the jailers), till he should pay all that he owed. So also My heavenly Father will deal with every one of you, if you do not freely forgive your brother from your heart his offenses. Matthew 18:23-35

There are at least two dimensions in this parable (that I am aware of )

1. Why do people not want to pay back the debt? Most likely they do not have money at that moment, but also I think that it is our selfishness. WE think of ourselves and our needs as more important than others. For example, in this story, the first attendant pleaded to give him mercy, like saying I know I need mercy, give me that. THe second one, probably was more sincere , he could not pay the debt at that moment but was willing to pay later. I noticed even in my heart this tendency. AS I received freely 100 dollars, I knew I had to pay back to Jenny, but immediately our thoughts came: Well, I would like to spend this money on my needs. Maybe I should pay her back of that sum of money. This is completely wrong! Jesus gives supernaturally to cover our debts (not only financial ut spiritual), yet we continue to serve our own needs and desires.
2. The point of this story is to be willing to forgive freely and not hold offenses against those who made us wrong. I feel that I am also in this category. It is so hard in my heart to let go and freely love with compassion my sister Tori. But no matter what I feel, God's word says to "freely forgive your sister from your heart her offenses".

tax for Me and for you

"In order not to give offense and cause them to stumle- that is, to judge unfavorably and unjustly- go down to the sea and throw in a hook; take the first fish that comes up, and when you open its mouth you will find there a shekel. Take it and give it to them to pay the temple tax for Me and for yourself." Matthew 17:27

We do have taxes and debts here on earth. I like how Jesus showed that He will provide money, but make sure that you give them to pay for tax and debt. It is an answer to my prayer what to do with $100 dollars I received today. I have a debt to pay to my friend Jenny Jung, because I borrowed $100 to cover my negative balance on the debit card. I was so thankful to her and now it is to pay it back with God's divine provision.

Lord, blessed are Your ways, Your Divine Ways!

p.s. Look at the words "take it and give it to them to pay the temple tax for Me and for yourself."

Jesus lives in me, so He is concern with everything I am in. He is a major part of me, I am the least of me...

my dear Erin, thank you

I just came to my room, there was an envolopw on the floor for me. I picked it up and went to the restroom with it. The card's envelope said "psalm 23". By the way, for this semseter I received two cards with Psalm 23 from Karen and this was from Erin Davis (from fast meeting yesterday). I still cry and feel unworthy to accept what was inside.

There was 100 dollars.
I can't explain it. I just know that it's so humbling and compassionate. Thank You Lord!
Thank You Lord! Thank You for dear Erin. I will not forget hear, my dear Erin. Thank you.

The presidency of the U.S.

George Washington was not the first President of the United States. He was the first President of the United States under the Constitution we follow today. And the first seven Presidents are forgotten in history.

In 1781, John Hanson was elected as the first president in the U.S. Six other presidents were elected after him - Elias Boudinot (1783), Thomas Mifflin (1784), Richard Henry Lee (1785), Nathan Gorman (1786), Arthur St. Clair (1787), and Cyrus Griffin (1788) - all prior to Washington taking office
George Washington (1789-1797)
John Adam (1797-1801)
Thomas Jefferson (1801-1809)
James Madison (1809-1817)
James Monroe (1817-1825)
John Q. Adams (1825-1829)
Andrew Jackson (1829-1837)
Martin Van Buren (1837-1841)
William Henry Harrison (1841)
John Tyler (1841-1845)
James K. Polk (1845-1849)
Zachary Taylor (1849-1850)
Millard Fillmore (1850-1853)
Franklin Pierce (1853-1857)
James Buchanan (1857-1861)
Abraham Lincoln (1861-1865)
Andrew Johnson (1865-1869)
Ulysses Grant (1869-1877)
Rutherford Hayes (1877-1881)
James Garfield (1881)
Chester Arthur (1881- 1885)
Grover Cleveland (1885-1889)
Benjamin Harrison (1889-1893)
Grover Cleveland (1893-1897)
William McKinley (1897-1901)

"The chief purposes of a fst are to clear our heads and hearts, to practice the discipline of detachment from what we suppose to be our needs, and to focus on hearing God rather than lobbying of our own compromised sinfulness..." (p, 83).

Relating to the war in Iraq, I think that many Christians (including myself) consider that what 's going on there is what supposed to be happening. However, I do consider that violence and war is not God's way but it also could be his wrath on the nation... AS you see, I am not very familiar on this topic just as it seemed to me that's what it supposed to be. However, in this world there are so much bad going on, that we do need to take "spiritual " weapons to fight the enemy.

The spiritual weapons are fsting, prayer, worship, th Word of God, evangelism, healing, deliverance, discipleship and missionary. So may our hearts turn to God with these weapons, so that God could bestow grace upon the nations instead of wrath.

Amen

"And let us call the church to fasting and prayer in repentance for the destrauction our nation has influenced upon the people of Iraq" (qt. in Jim Wallis, p. 79).

"This military action has killed at least 10,000 Iraqis, about 900 American soldiers have died in Iraq." (p. 80)

"At no time has he or any other national leader, of either political part, called the notaion to apologize or repent for these volent abd highnanded acts." (p.81).

"As Christians, what shall we say to these things? We are called to serve a Lord whotaught his followers to turn the other cheek when attacked and to love their enemies. We should aslo recall the passionate exhortation of St. Paul, "Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave room for the wrath of God... Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good." (p.81).

The newspaper "The Chronicle" for April 2008:

Has an article "'Adopt a Terrorist for Prayer' movement begins"

-The new web-based ministry, Adopt a Terrorist for Prayer (ATFP), helps Christians follow Jesus' instructions to love and pray for their enemies.

-The founder of ATFP is Dr. Thomas Bruce

-"It's all about connecting these prayer warriors to each other to see how others are praying, to encourage each other, to spread the word, and fight this Ward on Terrorism in a powerful and spiritual way."

- go to their website : http://www.myatfp.com/

SOME WAYS TO PRAY FOR TERRORIST:

• For heart changes


• For dreams and visions


• For irresistable pursuit by God's Spirit


• For inescapable proclamation of God's word


• For demonstration of God's grace


• For conviction of sins


• For freedom to respond


• Against spiritual blindness and bondage

Today most of the wolrd's people are poor-1.2 billion earn less than $1;

854 million are hungry.

• "The poor becoming hungrier while the appetites of the rich show little sich of subsiding. " (Jim Wallis p.73)

• "When we see a church that has fallen into accumulation and affluence, a church that is being consumed by its own consumption, we are witnessing a church that has fallen into idolatry." (Jim Wallis p.73).

My next comment is not relating to the poverty issue but just about colllege studying. I have thought that we spent so much time writing the papers (from 4 to 6 pages), yet the only thing we get back is the grade. The teacher is not discussing with us what our issues and point of view are. Do we grow if we just soak in our own thoughts? No response, no communication about what we write, why we write. I think that every student take an effort to put something valuable and meaningful in each paper (even if it it a sentence). It will be great if after spending so much time and energy in our papers, to be able to meet and talk with teachers and professors and hear their comments. WE need to grow and hear the responses from the older generation. The only time we hear their response is the group discussion. But have you noticed that not all people are comfortable to share and open in front of others? What is the purpose of writing all those papers, anyway? I love writing and searching the information, but after 4 years of college I question the fruitfullness of its approach.

Thanks

This morning I have been asked by Tori: "Can we live the rest 1,5 weeks in peace?" I asked her: "What does it require?" SHe said: "Just be kind to each otehr, but do not expact anything..." I told her: "I will try". WHen I came back to the room , the sorrow and diapoinment came on me: "Did she care for her convenience last weeks of finals or did she truly care for our relationship?" Becaue I thought it was her selfish desire to experience the last weeks of finals without anxiety and so forth, I was sad.

By the way, at around 11 am (still the morning), but I felt like the whole day run through and I was tired and exhuasted. So, I went to Haven and the Lord provided a meal for me for free.
My next class it at 2pm and before that time I am reading the book for another class.

By the way, when yesterday I was crying in my secret room, Danielle came and hugged me. She said : "Do you wanna talk?" I nodded No. I also did not feel trusty to share with her my feelings and what God was doing in me. TOday I met her on the way, she hugged me again, asked ferw questions. I do not feel the same toward her, but it could be just my bitterness and uneasy with the whole situation with Tori.

Thank you Lord,
for letting me go through this. I thought yeasterday that it is my lesson so that in future I would be able to keep silence in the group or public resistence.

I wonder how my mom is doing, probably busy. May the Lord with His angels guard her in all the ways and bring her safely to the U.S. I am looking forward to show her that "secret room", give her the pillow, feed her on campus, and cry in her shoulders.

It feels very lonely here. But I ahve Sarah and Rhyse who are a great support, as well as Phil and Tara. Of course the Lord is my help and support.

I will wait on Him,
He will console me. Praise to Him!

searching for the answer

Well, let's learn from the opposite example given in MAtthew 12:43-45

"But when the unclean spirit has gone out of man, he roams through dry places in search of rest, but he does not find any. Then he says, I will go back to my house from which I came out. ANd when he arrives he finds the plae unoccupied, swept, put in order and decorated. Then he goes and brings with him seven other spirits more wicked than himself, and they go in and make their home there. And the last condition of that man becomes worse than the first."

Let's come back to the scripture in Matthew 12:35 "The good man from his inner good treasure flings forth good things, and the evil man out of his inner evil storehouse flings forth evil things."

Question

And now I have a question: how can God come and live in theinner man of a person when that person is nothing, beggar, poor?

Would glory come in to that undeserved place of a body of a mere men?

Where is the wisdom here?
Teach me Lord, I pray.

Amen

Treasure in the man

Matthew 12:35

The good man from his inner good treasure flings forth good things, and the evil man out of his inner evil storehouse flings forth evil things.

How deep this message, yet a little that I copmrehend. Help me Lord!

I noticed that this scripture realtes to the Epesians 3:16, 19. It talks about God's rich treasure in the inner being of a man.

I prayed to God: "Make me rich in the heavenly. Do not give me the riches earthly. Let me store the riches in heaven. But Now there is a new dimension to that prayer:

"Dear Lord, I pray and ask you to grant me the riches of Your presence within my spirit an dinner man. Make me rich in my inner being. Amen."

God is good.
Where God is in the inner being of a man, that man becomes a good man.

Hunger

"His disciples were hungry"... Matthew 12:1
We are hungry, we are hungry, we are hungry for You (the song)

His disciples were hungry
and we will be hungry as well.
Fill me and flood me with Yourself, Your Spirit and Love!

"the Pharisees saw it, they said to Him, See there! Your disciples are doing what is unlawful and not permitted on the Sabbath. He said to them, Have you not even read what David did when he was hungry, and those who accompanied him? (1 Sam 21:1-6; Lev.24:9) How he went into the house of God and ate the loaves of the showbread, which it was not lawful for him to eat nor for the men who accompanied him, but for the priests only?"... Matthew 12:2-4

God allows through Christ to hunger for Him no matter if you are a priest or a mere disciple. Hunger is good and you can come to the house of God and eat His bread. Hunger is good, remeber that. That will always allow you to come into the house of God!

Dream

The desires:

To buy an Amplified Bible (especially New Testament)
To have a printed machine
To write on the CD the songs God gave me

Farther Dreams:
To raise the dead
To dance for Christ
Do mighty works for GOD the Father
Proclaim the Kindom of God

Ephesians 3:16,19

Ephesians 3:16

May He grant you out of the rich treasury of His glory to be strengthened and reinforced with mighty power in the inner man by the Holy Spirit Himself-indwelling your innermost being and personality.

Ephesians 3:19

That you may be filled through all your being unto all the fullness of God- that is may have the richest measure of the divine Presence, and become a body wholly filled and flooded with God Himself!

Fast meeting at Prayer Room on campus

Voila!
I attended a fast meeting at our prayer room on campus. At first I felt out of place and uneasy to share, but our leader the lady started speaking, the presence of God filled the room. At that moment I did not care about who is around. GOD was the Center of it all!

After a great time,

I have talked to her personally, rahter crying and flooding with tears. This is what she said: "God is going to use you mightily." She said that all the people whom God uses mightily go through this dark testing time "the shadow of death". I felt hope and faith that God will do something through me. Yeah

But when I left that precious room, I cried intensively and shaked so desperately. I could not stop. Then I came to my beloved "secreat room" in Morison and prayed...

I love God and His ways!!!!

Love Him!!!!

the Gospel

I feel HUNGER for the GOSPEL>>>>>

I just want to read THE NEW TESTAMENT to see and witness about JESUS and the HOLY SPIRIT>>>>>

Father, I glorify You for sending Your dear BElOVED SON to save sinners.

James 1:22

"Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says." James 1:22


The Bible Study:


Read the passage from the Bible and then intentionally seek the ways how to do what it says.


I think it is a helpful way to build your Christian walk with Christ.





There are so many different ways for Bible Study: memorize the scriptures, confess the word, word study, etc.


I think that reading the Bible with an intention to get out of it things to do is a great way.


Lord, help me to do as You instruct.





I am a forgetful and deceived person, because I listen to the Word of God a lot, yet little that I do.

Prophetic words on April 23, 2008

Chuck Pierce:
" This is the perfect time for self-reflection. It is the perfect time to do a "spring-cleaning" of your emotions and mind."

Kathy:

"I say that He is King od kings and Lord of lords. I say that He is faithful and true, even when we don't understand. I say that He is the God who keeps His promises, the God who gives us victory, and the God who heals our wounds"

Amen and Amen.

Commitment

Commitment is to be dedicated to a specific purpose, activity, assingment or a person.

It is a pledge or promise.

What is the value of commitment?

What does it do to a person wellbeing?

Is it important to a Christian faith?

What are the examples of commitment?

Where am I with commitments?

My friend Rhyse asked me to participate in a Bible Study, and I have a hard time to commit myself to it.

I had a difficulty to commit myslef in the past to a person for the future mariage becuase I tried to change him or give up when the tough times came.

Sometimes I fail to be where I suposed to be for school... (classes, meetings, etc)

For a long time (while I am being in America) I did not dedicate myself to a specific church.

I used to think that I like changes and new things, but maybe underline reason for that

is my unwillingness to commit for a long time.

Commitment to God

Commitment to people

Commitment to work and study

Commitment to goals

Commitment to church

How does my lack of commitment effect?

There is a dissapointment and unsure feelings about future.

There is lack of trust to people

There is a fear of unknown

Commitment sounds boring to people who like adventure and new experiences, but a true life cannot exist without commitment. Look, Jesus asked people to follow Him. He cannot intrust the Kingdom of God to those who wanted to escape and return to their previous life.

Commitment is a constant choice to wait and prevail in patience.

Commitment is inconvinience in our worldview

Commitment is the bond that is not easily broken

Но я к Богу обратился бы, предал бы дело мое Богу,
Который творит дела великие и неисследимые, чудные без
числа,
дает дождь на лице земли и посылает воды на лице
полей;
униженных поставляет на высоту, и сетующие возносятся во
спасение.
Он разрушает замыслы коварных, и руки их не довершают
предприятия.
Он уловляет мудрецов их же лукавством, и совет хитрых
становится
тщетным:
днем они встречают тьму и в полдень ходят ощупью,
как
ночью.
Он
спасает бедного от меча, от уст их и от руки
сильного.
И
есть несчастному
надежда, и неправда затворяет уста
свои.
Блажен человек,
которого вразумляет Бог, и потому
наказания
Вседержителева не отвергай,
ибо
Он причиняет раны и Сам
обвязывает их; Он
поражает, и Его же руки
врачуют.
В шести
бедах спасет тебя, и в
седьмой не коснется тебя
зло.
Во время
голода
избавит тебя от смерти, и
на войне – от руки меча.
От
бича
языка
укроешь себя и не убоишься
опустошения, когда оно придет.
Опустошению и голоду посмеешься и
зверей земли не убоишься,
ибо с
камнями полевыми у тебя союз, и звери
полевые в мире с тобою.
И
узнаешь, что
шатер твой в безопасности, и
будешь смотреть за домом
твоим, и не
согрешишь.
И увидишь, что семя твое
многочисленно,
и отрасли твои, как
трава на земле.
Войдешь
во гроб
в зрелости, как
укладываются снопы пшеницы в
свое
время.

Proverbs 1:23
Обратитесь к моему обличению: вот, я изолью на вас дух мой, возвещу вам слова мои.


Proverbs 19:20
Слушайся совета и принимай обличение, чтобы сделаться тебе впоследствии мудрым.


Proverbs 15:12
Не любит распутный обличающих его, и к мудрым не пойдет.

Hebrews 12:1-13

1.
свергнем с себя всякое бремя и запинающий нас грех ис терпением будем проходить предлежащее нампоприще,
2.
взирая на начальника и совершителя веры Иисуса, Который, вместо предлежавшей Ему радости, претерпел крест, пренебрегши посрамление, и воссел одесную престола Божия.
3.
Помыслите о Претерпевшем такое над Собою поругание отгрешников, чтобы вам не изнемочь и не ослабеть душами вашими.
4.
Вы еще не до крови сражались, подвизаясьпротив греха,
5.
и забыли утешение, которое предлагается вам, как сынам: сын мой! не пренебрегай наказания Господня, и не унывай, когда Он обличает тебя.
6.
Ибо Господь, кого любит, того наказывает; бьет же всякого сына, которого принимает.
7.
Если вы терпите наказание, то Бог поступает с вами, как с сынами. Ибо есть ли какой сын, которого бы не наказывал отец?
8.
Если же остаетесь без наказания, которое всем обще,то вы незаконные дети, а не сыны.
9.
Притом, если мы, будучи наказываемы плотскими родителями нашими, боялись их, то не гораздо ли более должны покориться Отцу духов, чтобы жить?
10.
Те наказывали нас по своему произволу для немногихдней; а Сей – для пользы, чтобы нам иметь участие в святости Его.
11.
Всякое наказание в настоящее времякажется не радостью, а печалью; но после наученным через него доставляет мирный плод праведности.
12.
Итак укрепите опустившиеся руки и ослабевшие колени
13.
и ходите прямо ногами вашими, дабы хромлющее не совратилось, а лучше исправилось.

Dynamic Semester

This is the most dynamic semster I've ever had!

• walked through the valley of the shadow of death


• was afraid to be in Hell


• suffered silence


• was in poverty and in need


• fasted


• sinned a lot and repented often


• worried about future ways


• felt homesick


• created 4 songs

What things did I learn about God through all of these?

He is with me. (Ps. 23:4)

The Lord is longsuffering and merciful. (Ps. 103:8-13)

As for God, His way is perfect.

Psalm 18:30

Knock and it will be opened to you.

Matthew 7:7

Long Hair

I had a dream that after I woke up my hair were long! t was so wonderufl feeling! MY hair were dark, staright, smooth and most important long!!!!

"If a woman has long hair, it is a glory to her" 1 Cor. 11:15

Interesting enough, that two days I am studying and reading about glory of God. he promised me to glorify me with His glory. So, I thank Jesus for the wonderful dream and Hid glory.

Reject all discouragement that is attempting to rob you of your momentum! This past week while we were worshipping, it was as if the Lord gave me supernatural vision and I saw our emotions. I could see that the enemy had made ploys against God's saints to block feelings in us, to stop us from gaining new zeal in the Lord. I saw satan and his forces had erected hidden snares and were creating offenses to wound our wellbeing and capture our soul expressions, causing us to stumble and lose momentum.
Our longing comes from the power of our desire, locked in our emotions. While the Spirit of God is creating a desire for the NEW, the enemy is attempting to ensnare us with old patterns, remove our creative unction, and bring many distractions into our lives. We must rise up now and say, "I've got to have You to help me press through into this new place. Reorder my focus so I can pinpoint the enemy's movement around me!"

Indeed, i had experienced an atack from the enemy for my emotions. Nikolai spoke again his nice words to capture me into the old pattern. Honestly, because of this enemy attack, I could not concentrate on school work. It was a battle over my emotional well being.
I refuse to come back to an old pattern through Nikolai. Lord, rise up in me like a lion that Your roar will scar the enemy.
Lord, jesus, I repent for allowing myself to got caught in the enemy illusion. Thank you so much for revealing me again the danger related to Nikolai' situation. Blessed be your name.

In Jesus Christ, Katya

Galatians 2:20

I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.

But many who are first will be last, and the last first. Matthew 19:30


Therefore what God has joined together, let no man separete. Matthew 19:6

Hello my friends,
Today is Saturday. Yesterday Danielle, Tori, Kevin and me went to the Italian restaurant "Bravo", We all were dressed up as for the formal. It was a good time and good food. Then I came home and immediately the phone call from Nikolai. Because I was in a way emotionally thirsty for affection and affirmation, I let our conversation continue. We talked hours and hours. He brought up questions, I brought up questions, We laughed, discussed our disagreement, etc. it became clear that he is not giving up on me. It was weird because I enjoyed our conversation but I also told him that "no" there is not going to be anything more.

Then I had a dream which is not very important but just because it happened after our conversation I thought it impotant to write it down.
We were in the classroom with Dr. Mbito. The group asked me to be thier leader for the project. There were a lot of assignments and I knew that I am not a leader but I would like to take a position. So we agreed. Then I see myself waling with another girl to a building but nobody from our class is there. So I wondered how am I a leader if I don't know where we are supposed to be. So we turned back from there and on our way back the people were coming toward that place two by two holding hands. I wonered but we just were there. Then it appeared "the last will be frist and the first will be last". Then somewhere in the middle I joined the group of people and we went to the police office. there were stairs. So I am walking up and see a lady sitting with closed eyes worshipping God by singing about the kingdom of God.I knew I had to show her my document to pass. When I passed her there was a music on TV : "Where you go I 'll go". I immediately started to dance and sing. Everybody was surprised including my sister but it was because of that song.

When I woke up I wondered about leadership....
But on one hand, Nikolai talked about the leadership that he received on his new job. We also talked about me being last instead of first on his list.


So I pray that God's wisdom will be with me in the name of Jesus.

Lord, You are a help to all who trust and call upon You. Please, listen to their cries and prayers. I know that You are good and abundant in mercy. Just as David said: "For You, Lord, are good, and ready to forgive, and abundant in mercy to all those who call upon You" (Ps. 86:5). So, Father, I pray, that You will be merciful and forgiving through Your Beloved Son.

Jesus, I thank You for the Cross and Your Blood shed on it. Who could ever deliver us form our sins and iniquities? We were like sheep withouht shepherd. But You became a lving sacrifice and You are a true shepherd.

I love to say this to You: "Who is like You, glorious in holiness, fearful in praises, doing wonders?" (Exodus 15:11) Jesus, You are the One who sets people free. Jesus, come to their rescue even today. Please, draw them near to Your Cross! Make them alive in You!

And let all the praise and glory be Yours!

Faithfulness and mercy

Dear Lord, I love You and Praise You for the love for us.
Blessed be Your Name!
I read in Your word: "My faithfulness and My mercy shall be with him" (Psalm 89:24). This verse most likely speaks of our Lord Jesus; but I also pray this scripture personally.

Jesus, may Your faithfulness and mercy shall be with me.

Jesus, may Your Faithfulness and Mercy shall be with

Iana and Michael!!!!

Today, Sarah and I met and had a great time. We prayed, read the scriptures and at the end worshipped in songs. The Lord anwered to one of the prayer even today. I had difficulties with my roommate. We prayed over that situation and talked about it. When I came home, she appologized. It was such a relief and thankfullness. Great is our God!

But there is another thing that caputred my attention. The situation with Nikolai is a battle over my trust. Whould I trust the voice of the Lord that clearly made known His will to me that Nikolai is no the right person for me, or whould I waver and trust the persistence and the words of Nikolai. My goal is to trust Jesus Christ even without understanding everything. "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own undersanding" (Pr.3:5).

"The Lord is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer; the God of my strength, in whom I will trust" 2 Samuel 22:2-3

"Trust in the Lord... feed on His faithfulness. Commit your way to the Lord, trust also in Him, and He shall bring forth your righteousness as the light, and your justice as the noonday" Psalm 37: 3,5


This dream happened in the beginning of the February month. The circumstances for the dream were folowing: On Saturday 2, I was supposed to meet Nikolai to give him his staff and the gift. However, by the deliverance of God, the meeting did not happen. But this was the dream prior to Saturday.
Here was the dream:

I was sleeping on my bed in the dorm. In the hallway there was loud voices, the door was slightly opened. My roommate was Jenny but she was with her guy friends, so she was not in the room. Then I hear some guys came into the room. The next thing happened is that I felt a fat face kissing me. I could not open my eyes but with all my strength I pushed him away. Those guys were leaving the room with laughing, mocking... I was still in my bed thinking about what had happened. THen I arose and went outside to the hallway.There were two groups on each side, so I asked them: "What's going on?" People were loud and the environment was wicked. Then I was in a kitchen, then one red hair guy came in and tells me:"I love you". I realized that it was the same guy who kissed, so I argued with him that he does not love me. He started to seduce me and on the floor we were wrestling. Then I saw standing and I touched his shoulder and said: "I do not trust a guy but my trust is in the Rock, Jesus Christ." Immediately, the guy became weak, powerless, afraid and left the kitchen. I called the police.

This dream means that God warns me not to trust Nikolai by any means. My only trust is in Christ Jesus. The kiss meant a betrayal like Judah toward Jesus. The funny thing is that when Nikolai called a day later he said: "I love you". It was a confirmation to the dream the Lord gave.

Then Jesus went into the temple of God and drve out all those who boght and sold in the temple, and overturned the tables of the money changers and the seats of those who sold doves. And He said to them, "It is written, 'My house shall be called a house of prayer,' but you have made it a 'den of thieves'.

Matthew 21:12-13

Trust me

I had a dream.

I was newly married. My husband and me were living in a simple house. That young men spoke the words: "Trust me. I will not forsake you, nor leave you." I had a feeling of distrust to him to be fully His in body, spirit and soul. Then I was by myself in a room. Outside was summer, people old and young were enjoying the water, splashing andplaying games, then I closed the curtains and came to the mirror comletely naked and started to dance. Then I hear the voice of a husband. He noticed that the black cat came into the ouse and spoke with a different voice. So we both realized it was a demon. Together we fought against it. The cat was trying to jump on me but then he, my husband, took the cat, I opened the door, he threw it away and I quickly shut it. There was heard unpleasant scream. My husband made sure that the door was looked.
Then we both came to the kitchen holding hands and kneeled down by the window. I started to thank Jesus in prayer. While still I was praying I woke up.

You know in a dream it was not clear that he was Jesus, but because of what He said and done to me, He proved to be Jesus who is with me.
Then I repented over the mirror and letting coming the evil.
And then I thought about word "trust" which is similar to "faith". When Jesus said "have faith in Me", He means "Trust me".

Thank You Jesus.

Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant seeking beautiful pearls, who, when he had found one pearl of great price, went, and sold all that he had and bought it

Matthew 13:45-46

Greatest riches!!!!

I want to have the greatest richness that is in Christ Jesus.
Dear Jesus, the world may look for the diamonds and expensive restaurants to eat, but my soul longs for You alone. You are the richest Gift! You are the Savior of my dark soul; You have lifted me up from the darkness and doom. Jesus, who is there like you? What riches will ever compare with You? You are worthy!

Thank You, Jesus, for becoming my friend!

Dear Jesus, My only Savior!
To You I pray and give my expectations.
You said to come to you and trust.
Jesus, in Your name I ask victory over impurity in my life. Let these seven days be in my life the days of purification. Jesus, create a work in my life that will glorify Your name!

Thank you for the great book "Pioneer Experiences" that shares the testimonies of people who discovered holiness through Jesus Christ. I am reading it and thinking of a work that you could do in me.

To You be the glory and honor.

Save and restore,
Lead to the Way Everlasting.
Promises and vows
Now find new ground...
Jesus , Jesus,
Jesus, Jesus
Meek and Holy,
Touch unholy
And make it holy.

water...

SPIRIT SONG OVER THE WATERS.

(1789 by Goethe).

THE soul of man

Resembleth water:

From heaven it cometh,

To heaven it soareth.

And then again

To earth descendeth,

Changing ever.

living worthy

I had an interesting day. Today I have learned things about Vgotsky (Russion psychologist) and about Paul's letter to Phillipians. Here is the scripture that I want to elaborate more:
"Living worthy of the gospel". What could this mean to me?

It is obvious to me that I believe in God but how obvoius and how worthy of the gospel it to others?
What I am trying to say is that there are different things in my life that are not worthy of the gospel. For example, skipping the class because I am lazy or sleeppy. Not doing my homework with excellence and consistency. And there are many other areas.

What shall I do?

The class has really challenged me today to live a life worthy of the gospel.
It will include sufferings for the good, making sacrifcies, rejoicing and being thankful, enduring and truthful before God, yourself and others.

Lord, help me to live a life worthy of You and Your Gospel. Let every day I will be reminded that to live is Christ. Lord, let all my life has a visible reflecting of the Invisible God.

With love and thankfulness,
Katya

Shadow of death

This is a new season in my life. It is called "the valley of the shadow of death".
But despite the difficulties, loneliness, other issues the word says: "I will fear no evil for You are with me."

Lord, I pray that You will help me to move on. Establish my path in Your righteousness and truth. Thank You so much!